Friday, January 20, 2012

Five Sentence Fiction - Radiance

Look, here we are, sitting on the backdoor wooden steps of my grandmother’s old house, completely immersed in our conversation – Aunt Bella, age 80, and I, age 5.

A summer day that remains sepia-toned, kept in an old cookie tin with the rest of my childhood.

I had just finished styling  Aunt Bella’s dove white hair with her silver handled brush – gently, gently.

When I finished, I sat down beside her, pulled myself close and, as I looked up at this woman I loved with all my heart, I lifted my 5 year old hand to trace  her impossibly soft,deeply set wrinkles.  

And looking down at the unlined face of a little girl she loved with all her heart, my Aunt Bella smiled.
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11 comments:

  1. Angie RichmondJanuary 20, 2012 at 5:56 p.m.

    Beautifully written! I can see the Radiance :)

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  2. RuthJanuary 20, 2012 at 8:28 p.m.

    Beautiful. Thank you for a lovely scene.

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  3. Cara MichaelsJanuary 21, 2012 at 9:29 a.m.

    Lovely, JT. Actually made me tear up a bit.

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  4. McKenzieJanuary 21, 2012 at 10:22 a.m.

    This is so heart warming!

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  5. Donna B. McNicolJanuary 21, 2012 at 12:06 p.m.

    Wow! Very nice, definitely paints a picture of radiance.

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  6. Kern WindwraithJanuary 21, 2012 at 2:47 p.m.

    What a lovely and unexpected take on "radiance." You've captured the moment beautifully, on both an emotional and sensory level. You have a gift for tapping into the essential truths of memory and experience, of making us feel and live them as thought they were our own.

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  7. Lillie McFerrinJanuary 21, 2012 at 5:47 p.m.

    Love descriptions. Great, warm piece :)

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  8. No oneJanuary 21, 2012 at 9:40 p.m.

    The love is palpable. What a beautiful memory.

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  9. Jo-AnneJanuary 22, 2012 at 4:04 p.m.

    Thank you so much for the kind words of encouragement! The story is, as Sif says, a memory - a very dear one. My Aunt Bella died when I was 10 but I still remember her kind eyes, her voice thick with an Aberdeen lilt, our walks to the park (slowly, her feet weren't very good,)and how she would play endless games of "Go Fish" with me whenever I visited. I adored her. I have a momento of hers, given to me by my Grandmother, that I wasn't supposed to get. But my Grandma said that Bella's children wouldn't understand how much it would mean to me, so she gave it to me as a secret. It is a little thing (I won't say what) but it means a lot to me and everytime I look at it, I picture her smiling down at me.

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  10. MeghanJanuary 22, 2012 at 6:28 p.m.

    Wow, that was really beautiful. I get a real sense of the special relationship between yourself and your Aunt Bella.

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